Can you believe that this is the third time I’ve blogged with this title? “Do what you love.” I’m not surprised. It never hurts to remind myself, but also I’m in that mindset, particularly when my #OneWord2025 is LOVE. Gosh… it took me months to commit to that word and now I’m “in love” with my one word. It takes time for the one-word to take hold, but I am realizing that LOVE was a natural next step from HAPPY. So, this blog post is going to talk about a few things that “I love” to do. It’s fun to do this.
First, I am so happy to be doing my weekly blog only on one website versus two. I was maintaining two websites, thus two blogs, for a year or so because I lost access to this website a few years ago and I was making a website for some courses I taught at the university. Now, I have access to this website (due to serendipity and good luck) and I’m no longer teaching portfolio in the M.Ed. or B.Ed. programs. I don’t need a work portfolio. It has taken me a few months to “let go” but I’m good with only one blog.
Second, I am really getting into thrifting. It was something I did out of utility when I first moved to Prince George, and my kid liked to go thrifting to buy clothes and such when she was younger. We both stopped for a few years and now I’m just getting back into it. I found some flower vases, led crystal pieces, and some unexpected wins. Just the other day, I bought a Corningware set on Facebook Marketplace as part of an estate sale. (See photo). I love these pieces and got a great deal on them. It’s too fun.
Finally, my last mention of “doing what I love” is beading. A former student of mine reached out to me and asked if I wanted to go out on Wednesday nights to bead. It’s a 3-hour session and I just LOVE IT. I know in the fall that I will be teaching a night class, but for the spring and summer, this connection with the former student and all those in this beading group has been absolutely blissful. The 3 hours just fly by and I’m enjoying returning to what brings me a lot of joy and time to hone my beading skills.
I have so much to be grateful for and these are only a few examples of “doing what I love.” It feels good to prioritize my interests and learning how to embrace change and navigate in ways that go with the flow and be open to the present. I’m just in LOVE.
Written by Christine Ho Younghusband, May 24th, 2025 | No Comments »
I started this blog post yesterday and it quickly started a tangent. I’m not sure if it’s because I was being avoidant or if I was distracted. There is nothing like the act of procrastination, a new day, and a redo. So here I am again to start this blog post over. My dear friend passed away on Wednesday, May 14, 2025. She was 10 years junior. She just turned 45 years old on April 20, 2025. I am not sure what to make of this. She was diagnosed with glioblastoma in October 2023. I remember the phone call. It was like 430 am and she was texting me. She could not sleep and so I called her. She said that she was diagnosed with brain cancer… or brain tumour. She did not tell me the exact diagnosis although over time, thanks to Google, I was able to figure it out before she told me her diagnosis. It’s heartbreaking and shocking at the same time.
She was struggling for awhile. It was often contributed to tiredness and workload because she was in a doctoral program at UBCO, and she commuted to Kelowna from Vancouver via plane, most times, to attend class. She was working full-time at the university, she was an RA, and she was a full-time parent to two young adolescent children. If anything, she was busy, so I can see that it was easy to make a correlation of her workload to her headaches and tiredness. However, when certain deadlines had ceased, her symptoms did not. I remember her at WFATE 2023 in Victoria, BC. She was presenting, organizing a dinner for BCTEN, and doing life as a PhD student. She was not feeling well that week and again, seemed very busy, but managed to keep up with everything. Keeping a brave smile, her headaches persisted. Luckily, she has close friends who encouraged her to go to the doctor to find out what’s wrong.
She was so determined to stay alive and be with her children. She underwent 3 brain operations, radiation, and chemotherapy. Nothing worked. The tumour kept growing and her body (and mind) slowly fading away. I spoke to her a few times and messaged some other times. You could see the rapid decline. Each time, I thought it would be the last time I would see her. I even went to go visiter once with another mutual friend at her place. She was still hosting even though she was not well. Her strength and stamina were unsurpassed. I would not believe what she was willing to endure to extend her life. According to the websites, without treatment, she had 3 months to live. With all of the interventions she took, she lived for 19-months after her diagnosis. She was aiming for 10 years, but what she has achieved was a testament to her and the fight for her life. Over time, she was able to make peace with family members and strengthen key relationships, and say goodbye everything.
I cannot believe that it would be easy saying goodbye to everything that she worked so hard for. She had to say goodbye to her job in teacher education at the university. There are photos of her packing up her office. I was happy that she made that choice for herself. She had to say goodbye to her doctoral work. She worked so hard to get into the PhD program. She was in the program of her dreams and had a very supportive supervisor. Her career was on the rise, and her identity and sense of self-worth were deeply embedded in getting into that program. For awhile, she had ambitions to complete the program while she was ill, but over time she realized that it would not be possible. Letting go must have been incredibly difficult to do. She even stepped back from BCTEN, and she loved that work. Finally, I can only imagine, that she had to say goodbye to her life and her family. Honestly, I can’t even imagine, but she spent her last moments in hospice with her close family and friends.
After 19-months of struggle, pain, and goodbyes, I am relieved she is at peace.
Written by Christine Ho Younghusband, May 20th, 2025 | No Comments »
The fair came by last week. My kid and I walked over to the fair to walk around and pick up a bag of mini-doughnuts. We shared the bag before heading out for lunch. It was a gorgeous day and the doughnuts were pretty good too. It was the last week my kid “off” from school before starting her summer job at the hospital as an ESN (employed student nurse). She’s on her night shift as I write. It’s a new way of being for me. Not only have I splurged on a Nespresso coffee maker (for Mother’s Day) and enjoy an espresso con panna anytime of day at home, I am also in love with my cat (of which I am watching in the corner of my eye playing a new toy I got her earlier tonight). Is this how life is going to be? Me… the cat lady!! My kid will also be going away to complete her 5-week clinical as well as part of Year 3 of her program. I think that will be the real test. She will be leaving “the nest” soon… Year 4 will come and go. I am so grateful that my kid chose to come with me to Prince George during the “turbulent years.” I could not have transition to “my independence” without her.
I can’t believe that this is my 21st Mother’s Day. It doesn’t feel like 21 times. I can celebrate this day every year with LOVE and joy. As mentioned, I bought myself a Nespresso (and LOVE it) and I got myself a pottery mug from the art gallery as well (for Mother’s Day). As you can see, I’m not shy. But, my kid will be coming home after her shift at 7am on Mother’s Day and likely sound asleep when I wake up. Please note, I’m writing this blog post in the middle of the night because I am WIDE AWAKE from my expresso earlier tonight. I needed a boost to get on with my day, but now I’m alert. LOL. Hence, I’m writing about Mother’s Day in the future tense. Yes, it’s Mother’s Day right now… but it’s just after midnight. My cat is not a fan of me staying up late, but I realized tonight that I love being going out for a walk in the evening (ie., going to Walmart or the Superstore in Prince George) and I am truly a “late to bed, late to rise” kind of person. As much as I would like to be an early to bed, early to rise person… it will NEVER happen. Trust me, I’ve tried. But what I am realizing is, I am on my own.
There is nothing wrong with being independent, but I am acknowledging that my kid is growing up. She’s an adult and she too will be independent. Parenting… no one really talks about these transitions. My kid taught me so much about life (i.e., having an Nespresso… I don’t think I can go back to the Keurig, which is hers as well). Sigh. So, with this change in momentum with my kid and me as she continues to engage in her nursing program and work, I am learning how to be the “new” me. I am also trying to wean myself off my phone. I’m so done with that thing, but I am have horrible habits to break. I was inspired by a YouTube video done by a fellow BC Educator’s kid, Makari Espe, “How I cut my screentime by 80%.” I will start my Mother’s Day with having my phone charging downstairs, that is, one floor away from my bedroom. So much time is SUCKED away when I have my phone near my bed. I have took off some apps already, but I will be replacing my phone with reading. Let’s see how this goes.
Mother’s Day is about celebrating yourself… and LOVE my kid. I have also decided to commit to my weekly blog with this WordPress site and I am taking a break from my other WordPress site related to my work at the university. I am no longer teaching any courses that has EdTech and portfolios, so modelling how to create and develop a website as a platform for reflective practice is no longer needed. Again, change. I think the real gift I can give myself is creating change rather than respond to change (that happens to me). It’s not one or the other, but what I want to say is… I’m moving forward. And, I can do this!! HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!! PS: I love being a mom!! xo
Written by Christine Ho Younghusband, May 11th, 2025 | Comments Off on Onto the Next Step
Admittedly, this is how it feels. See image. Isn’t she cute? Anyway, I’m not sure why I do this, but I have stints of working really hard followed by stints of severe rest, and the slow haul to get back to a steady work flow. I did this all of the time when I worked in K-12. The breaks are needed. Teaching can take a lot from you and sometimes you can’t even meet your own expectations. We have limitations. I do have a friend who works FOREVER at a capacity that I am unable to attain (or would strive for), but I am getting back at things and it feels good to sit down and map out the spring/summer term to get as much writing, research, and productivity done before the fall term begins. I’ve designed it this way. It’s my first term at the university without teaching a course. In our collective agreement, faculty members can have one term off from teaching, but in the teacher education program that goes year round and being teaching faculty with 8 courses per year, it’s reasonable to spread out your courses over 12-months. Now I have 10% for research, 10% doing projects for the school of education, I am teaching 6 courses now, of which I am teaching 2 courses in the fall, 4 courses in the winter, and no courses in the spring/summer. Honestly, it feels great.
I am hoping to renew my contract. I wished I was a driven as some folks I know. But, with rest and restoration, I am learning what’s important to me and what I LOVE doing. I love teaching. I love learning. I love writing reflectively. I love connection and community. I am involved in a few things that offer all of that to me so I hope I can continue doing what I am doing for the next three years. I have been reassured, but signing a contract would be nice. Now that I feel that I am back into “work mode” I feel that I need to take a moment to strategize my next steps for this spring/summer term to get the most out of the term. I have the CSSE Congress 2025 in Toronto and presenting on May 31, June 1, and June 2. I have 4 presentations. One I am co-presenting with members of a research team, another I am presenting with former students (who will be attending online), another I am co-presenting with a friend of mine, and another that I am presenting on my own. Preparing for the conference is my first course of action as well as completing a few papers that need addressing as well. After that, I have a book review and a couple conference proceedings to submit. There is a chapter I am also co-authoring with a colleague that’s due in June and there are other projects on the go. I am very excited about this term. Onwards and upwards.
Written by Christine Ho Younghusband, May 06th, 2025 | Comments Off on Listening to Yourself
As we approach the end of the month and transition to the spring/summer term, I took a moment to visit my family in the Lower Mainland. My cousin and her family came from Boston to Vancouver for a week or so to visit the west coast, and I also had a short visit a niece, nephew, and aunty who also live in Vancouver. I stayed at my brother’s place for a few days. He hosted a family dinner gathering one night and my sister hosted another. On my last day, my sister, brother, and my dad got together to have dim sum, but also visit my mom at the cemetery. We bought her new (fake) flowers for her resting place. Tulips. Very seasonal, but also very MOM. She loved tulips and it’s one of my memories of her when we visited the tulip farms in Abbotsford. We also had pizza that day. It was a good day and memory of mom.
I’m not sure what it will take to get me motivated enough… or ready enough… to engage in an autoethnography. When my mom passed away in 2018, I wanted to write about those 20-days (and my relationship with my mom) to investigate my ethnic identity but in particular write about belonging, self-efficacy, and positionality. I had a wonderful conversation with my cousin one night at my sister’s talking about my mom and sharing with her what I loved about my mom and why she was so special. Was that enough? I have very good memories of my mom, not limited to those 20-days, but I also have some challenging ones. It’s almost like I want to learn more about her so that I can get a better understanding of myself, but also how I make sense of the world in context to my family. I needed to learn about myself.
I am a second-generation Chinese Canadian. I was born and raised in Prince Rupert, BC. I don’t have any language (i.e., Cantonese) or engage in any cultural practices related to my ancestry. I was essentially assimilated to Canadian culture and language by my parents and Canadian society and institutions (even though my parents spoke Cantonese) such that I spent the first half-century of my life denying my cultural heritage and ethnic identity. When George Floyd died in 2020, I was struck by the question: Can I deny who I am for much longer or do I need to step up and “be ok” with being Chinese? A weird question, but it’s one that I had wrestled with for many, many years. Also around this time, I graduated with my doctorate in 2017, my mom passed away in 2018, and I separated from my husband in 2019. I moved away from my family in 2018 to pursue a job, we faced the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020, and I lived in my house during the pandemic until my kid moved up with me in 2021.
Up until this point, I was not living my life for myself and I had a lot of misconceptions about “the world.” In 2021, I was starting life all over again and it took a few years to finally find myself, my autonomy, and my agency as a person and academic. Even though I wanted to write about my mom in 2018, I couldn’t. Not because of the persistent crying and sadness, but because I was not whole or ready to write about and examine my experiences in a reasonable and realistic way. Lots was happening, and I was learning more about me. I had to look this up, but I divorced in 2023 (only 2-years ago) and I bought my own place last year (only 5-months ago). My kid continues to live with me and she is finishing up her third year in the nursing program. I am no longer angry, nor am I feeling oppressed or distant from myself.
Now, I know that I am my only agent and advocate. I choose how I would like to see life to be and to do what I love to do to find my purpose, my happiness, and my joy in life. I don’t have to meet anyone’s expectations but my own. The only person I need to prove anything to is myself. I never felt that way before (in my past life) but now I understand that my happiness is my own. I create what I see. I needed this time to “feel” ready to write. Well, I think there is no better time than the present. I was already looking at autoethnography resources (again) during this blog post and thinking about how I will go about collecting data (i.e., journals, self-reflection, interviews, etc.). I am ready. Being with my family this last week helped. Many of my aunties and uncles are still alive as well (in addition to my dad). It’s an opportunity to learn more about my mom and learn more about my identity and belonging.
Written by Christine Ho Younghusband, April 29th, 2025 | Comments Off on Being with Family
My kid made this for me… it’s all the rage… Thank you AI.
Hooray… it’s the end of the winter term. I loved every one of my classes… EDUC 201 (Educational Theory and Practice), EDUC 376 (Numeracy Foundations in the Elementary Years), EDUC 421 (Assessment and Motivation), and EDUC 656 (Instructional Leadership). I loved the folks who were in the classes and I loved the subject matter of each class. I think what challenged me the most was the schedule. I had two 4-hour teacher education classes back-to-back on Mondays and 3-hours night classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I was also balancing meetings, service work, and research. With my schedule, It sounded like a strong start on Mondays and coast for the rest of the week. I would not disagree with that as a description of my workflow, but because I had such a full Monday, I spent a good chunk of the weekend working or thinking about work. Rest was not an easy task, and if I did, I spent the whole week catching up. I am not complaining by any means, but I am grateful that that schedule is now over, my marks are submitted, and I have a few more tasks to complete the Winter 2025 term. I feel like I am reaching “the top” of my teaching career, much like I did in 2010 in teaching high school mathematics. The difference is this time is, I’m not 100% stressed out and rest is part of my way of being. I am learning how to write about my work at the university such that it appears “dreamy” and “productive”… I am not one to brag, but it’s the nature of my work to show value in what I am doing. In order to do that, I need to learn about my own value and believe it’s important. Anyway, I am digressing… I am super happy with the conclusion of the Winter 2025 term I have learned a lot with and from my students as well. I LOVE MY JOB and I love what I do. I wish I could just say that about my work, but I believe they want evidence of this “love” and a means to evaluate this feeling through some metrics to make a fair judgement. Nonetheless, I am so grateful to take a few days off this long weekend to REST and do things for myself because it makes me happy. I finally bought a small desk that a built last night to got in front of my window (it was on sale for $89), and I bought a leather chair from the Bay (which was also on sale for $64). Oh my gosh, am I happy. Cheap, but not cheap… and I’m blogging as we speak facing out of my window. I love the natural light shining on my face as I type, but I also like to people watch. There’s just enough distraction to keep me focused. It’s much like being in a coffee shop, without the barista. I did not write in my blog last week. I was cognitively paralyzed by the marking I had to do. Strangely, when I got to my marking, I loved every minute of it. As soon as I stepped away from the mindset of evaluating and grading to LEARNING (what am I learning and what did they learn), the marking process was a joy. So, I’m setting the stage… first, with a big blog ramble… and second, with my desk oriented in my room to promote creativity, joy, and writing.
Written by Christine Ho Younghusband, April 20th, 2025 | Comments Off on A New Beginning
Oh geez… it’s the end of the winter term. I have such mixed feelings about it. I loved my classes. I was teaching EDUC 421 (Assessment and Motivation), EDUC 376 (Numeracy Foundations in the Elementary Years), EDUC 201 (Education Theory and Practice), and EDUC 656 (Instructional Leadership). Honestly, I loved all of these courses for different reasons. Two of the courses are in the teacher education and my classes were focused on the Elementary Years Cohort. The other two classes were in the undergraduate and graduate programs respectively. I learned so much from each of those classes, but also I got to share what I love and love to learn with the students as well. What a gift!! I think that I am about 90% there with feeling good about my pedagogy and honing my craft in a way that is authentic to who I am. Looking back at my former teaching practice, many elements are similar upon reflecting on how I taught secondary mathematics near the end of my time in K-12 schools. But what’s different between my two practices in teaching is taking the intentional time to REST.
One of the things I was working on and developing in 2024 is taking Saturdays as “be a person” day. What I mean by that is, do what you want to do to move life forward without feeling any guilt or shame for not doing work on that day. Often, the work for educators is endless and its often in the mind with no off-switch. I practiced this way throughout my time in K-12 education. I worked around the clock. I remembered working at 2-3 am and I was a new mom, but had returned back to work with new prep. In the dark, I heard a thump, thump, thump. It was my kid coming down the stairs with her blanket and she just stared at me wondering… what the??? Then, she hopped on the couch behind me and went to sleep. Of course, I kept on working. All nighters was a “normal” thing for me to do. I can only imagine the quality of my work after an all-nighter. This story does not mention all of the times I went to work sick. A part of me is very thankful for the COVID-19 pandemic that insists that people to STAY HOME with any symptoms that resembled COVID-19. Strangely, it was a blessing.
Admittedly, I did do a couple of all-nighters this term. My schedule was somewhat brutal in the sense that I had 2 courses back-to-back on Mondays (i.e., 8-hours of instruction) and I had conditioned myself to take Saturdays (which often included part of Fridays and Sundays) off to rest and “be a person.” Even though I know the course content, it takes about a 1:1 ratio of time to prep. I like to make the learning relevant for the learners in my class. And as you know, no person and no class is the same from year to year. The intention to cater each class so that it creates a “scope and sequence” that is personalized for those ho are in the room. A full day of teaching on Mondays, then a night class on Tuesdays and another night class on Thursdays made my schedule for the week. To prepare for and teach on Mondays, everything else is parked. I parked so much stuff that I did not catch up on what I wanted to catch up on during the 5-weeks I did not have this class due to practicum, a long weekend, and weeklong break. I’m astounded. There is so much to do and so little time.
I’m not complaining. I loved these classes and I think it took me the whole 13-weeks to figure out my flow for the term. That is so weird, but it’s true. By the time it came to my last class on Thursday nights, I felt like I got my rhythm. Unfortunately, the term ended. What I do commend myself for is recognizing the need for rest. So, what I noticed is, I cannot do any work after I teach. So, no emails, marking, or meetings on Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday nights. I just didn’t have the energy. I would make myself a yummy dinner at home, rest on my recliner, watch some TV, and go to bed (at a decent hour). I needed to do that for myself to regulate my time and work output. I also noticed that a 3-minute email the next morning would take 3-hours to write the night before. Moreover, I noticed that my brain could only hand certain things and information when it was ready and had “space” to think about those things. It made for more sound and reasonable take-action and decision making.
If anything, I wanted to not only do this balance between rest and work viable for me to stay sustainable and happy in my work, I wanted to model this way of being for my students, regardless of what program they are in. I also designed my classes so that they would respect student voice, rest, and activity. I think the “old me” wanted to keep ploughing ahead because I thought that was what was expected from me. Now, I understand, I can plough at my own pace. People can provide feedback, but I needed to be very clear about putting the students (and my wellness and wellbeing) at the centre of my practice. So, I took this weekend off. My last teaching day was last Thursday night. Assignments are due this week. I took the weekend to REST… despite the pile of work and timelines that are ahead of me. I didn’t even blog on the weekend. I did enjoy the company of a friend over breakfast and engaged in a few tasks for my home (i.e., recycling, laundry, food shopping, etc.), and I feel great!!
Written by Christine Ho Younghusband, April 07th, 2025 | Comments Off on Valuing Rest
Oh geez. Can you believe it? My twin brother came to visit me in Prince George. He came to my new place with boxes that I’ve stored in his storage locker in the Lower Mainland for 6-years. AMAZING. I can honestly say that my move is “in theory” complete. All of my stuff, of which I took from my home on the Sunshine Coast is now with me. Right now, those boxes are sitting in my garage. I will get to it when the semester is over and my marking is done. I’m anticipating that the experience of going through my garage, getting the winter tires from the car dealership (and my kid’s tires from my friends place) to store is in some easy and simple, and figuring out an organizing system in such a way that my kid can park her car in my garage is very exciting to me. I’m turning to a new chapter. And yes, I park my car outside on my driveway, but that’s another blog post (if it ever happens). My turn is coming soon.
What a nice selfie. My brother suggested that I take one and send the photo to my sister as evidence of a successful arrival. My twin bro drove up to Prince George from the Lower Mainland. He is “borrowing” my dad’s car, which soon will be his. Although it’s a 2010 vehicle. My mom and dad purchased that vehicle “brand new.” It was very splurgy. My parents never bought a new vehicle for themselves before, so it’s very special. My mom passed away in 2018 and my dad insists on driving the vehicle even though he can only see out of one eye. I say that jokingly, but I’m not joking. I also think that driving a vehicle is a symbol of independence for the elderly. My dad is not getting any younger and I like to believe that it’s something that both my mom and dad took pride in. Anyway, it’s time to pass the baton (aka., vehicle) on to my brother.
I am so happy to see my brother her in Prince George. It’s nice to have company. Normally, I’m going to Vancouver and staying at his place. He arrived Friday night, we went to Mr. Mike’s for dinner for nostalgic purposes only, and spent all day on Saturday together. He just left this morning to drive back home. And, it’s a beautiful sunny spring day for driving. My twin bro is the first family member to visit my home in-person (aside from my kid who lives with me) to check my place out (and drop of the boxes of which he did not want in his storage locker anymore… LOL). The transition to where I am today was SLOW. I’m not complaining, judging, or regretting. It’s been an incredible journey and I am very excited to see what’s in those boxes. A lot of the stuff, I think, are keepsakes, framed prints, and stuff from my mom. I can’t wait to uncover them and really assess what’s stays in my home and what goes. I also feel ready to write about my mom, so getting ethics is also on my things to do.
It’s super interesting when I blog. I love to reflect and take a moment to capture what I am feeling. I spent most of Sunday resting and relaxing. I’m cleaning up my house and taking it SLOW before getting back to the pile of work I need to address. I am doing my best on trying to have a “be a person” day and sleep at a regular time. I spent decades chasing and doing things beyond the means of what is expected of me or from me. I would do all-nighters or stay up really late to get stuff done. I’m now in a stage in my life or mindset where I feel that I would like to enjoy life, do what I love, and rest. There is nothing wrong with rest, but I am realizing that if I value this new pace of work, it’s ok to stay no as well. I guess that correlates to doing what you love as well. I really enjoyed spending time with my brother. I think we’ve done Prince George well and he even took a moment to get to know my cat. See image below. That’s a big deal and I am very appreciative. My twin bro should be home soon.
Written by Christine Ho Younghusband, March 30th, 2025 | Comments Off on Twinning
March 16, 2025 – Remembering My Mom in Different Ways
Last week I visited my mom’s resting place in the Lower Mainland. I’m not even sure if that’s what it is called. Her ashes are in an urn, in a glass enclosed shelf, in a building at the cemetery last week. I had visited Vancouver a few times over the last few months, but mostly those visits were related to work and I did not have the opportunity to go visit her. Last week was a weekend trip FOR ME and my brother had borrowed my dad’s car and we went out there to go visit her. I like to keep her updated on what’s happening and to say hello. It’s strange to go visit her. The photo of her that’s by her urn was taken before I was born. It’s not how I remember her as a child, but it’s a photo that she chose that she thought that best represented her. I remember when my mom was alive when she first invested in this resting place for her and my dad. She got name plates and everything. She wanted to take each of her children out to this site complemented with a lunch out at the golf course. By the time it got to my turn, I said… NO THIANK YOU… and that I would visit her when she was at the place, I had no desire to check out her resting place otherwise. So, there I was last week saying hello. A few thoughts shared and a few bows, all was good.
Now that I’m back home and lots of uncertainty with the economy, etc., I am very conscious about what I buy and how much I am spending. I have to pay utilities and property tax right now, and I have no idea what I have to pay for income tax, who knows what I will have to spend in the next few days, months, and years. The idea of going into a recession does not put my mind to ease by any means, but I will admit that I am more conscious about my spending habits and how much things cost as we anticipate rising costs and how much I used to spend. In the end, saving money and minimizing my spending is going to be key. I’ve cancelled a few memberships, and I wanted to cancel my cable package, but it seems like the company is no longer providing a basic cable package. I just need to find places to spend less, even though I am investing dollars in self-care. Strangely, I am just understanding it’s importance and the value in investing in those things like massages and therapy. Nonetheless, I am feeling very aware of money, with my mom whispering in my ear the importance of saving money. It was incredible how much money she was able to save. She was amazing at it. It almost reminds me of “extreme coupon,” the TV reality show.
As a kid, I remembered when we went shopping that my mom would by X-bread. This bread was found in a basket at the supermarket and it had a black X written on top of the price tag. Now as an adult, I know that the X-bread was day-old bread. Stale bread. And this bread was on sale for 50% off. I could never understand why she chose this bread. It almost seemed like she was insistent in buying this bread and I really did not like it. My dad would wake up every morning to have this bread. He would toast it, add peanut butter and honey to them, and he would eat it with a cup of Red Rose tea with milk and sugar. That was his morning ritual. I clearly remember him doing that and sipping from his tea cup. Til this day, I’m not a break-fan. It’s not my favourite even though I find myself toasting it as well, but to have an open-faced egg salad sandwich (of which was not my mom’s favourite). She was saving money. I know that now. So, when I bought this loaf of bread from the Superstore a couple of days ago, I thought of my mom. It was almost a compromise. I’m thinking about how much things cost and it was a fresh loaf of bread, but it cost $1.25. It this economy, it’s a steal. This loaf of bread will last us a long time. On the counter for a few days while it’s fresh, then it goes back into the fridge to have toast like my dad did.
Bread is still not my favourite, but I respect my mom who did what it took to make things happen. I have a huge regard for her and I realize now that I may not have acknowledged a lot that she has done. Admittedly, I never noticed until she had passed away 7-years ago. All of what she used to do for me, my siblings, and my dad are astounding. I had no idea. It’s moment like these when I am reminded that I want to write about my mom… maybe as an autoethnography or biography… not sure. As each day passes and I am “doing the work,” I am building up the courage to bring pen to paper. I will wait for this term to end and make a plan soon after. I had no idea how much of an impact my mom has made on me. I guess you don’t know until you know.
Written by Christine Ho Younghusband, March 16th, 2025 | Comments Off on Almost Like X-Bread
There is nothing wrong with a reboot. Last week entailed trying to catch up on a few outstanding items on my things to do list and I am happy to have finish a few things, even though it took waaaaaaaaay longer than I expected it would take to do. A comment reoccurrence for me… an underestimation of time. That’s ok. I’m learning and I am taking the time to understand how things work, how long it takes, and what I need to do to get things done. Furthermore, I’m not even sure how well I’m doing things, but that will be the next hurdle when it comes. I’m not being hard on myself, but I’m trying to keep a realistic and reasonable perspective of my work, my life, and my wellbeing. Admittedly, what has served me in the last year, and what I am taking into this year, is embracing SLOW, which required intentionality, LOVE, and rest.
I’m back in Vancouver/Burnaby. Coming back to the Lower Mainland feels like HOME. I am wondering if we can have different homes. Going to Prince Rupert also feels like home. And, I love my new place in Prince George. That feels like home too. Ahh… look at that food pic. I may have shared that image before, but it is one of my favourite meals to have. Often, going to The Boss Restaurant is one of the first things I do. This meal-of-choice is fish congee and lo bok go. I love the ginger and sesame oil flavours of the soup, the tender fish, and comforting texture and taste of the turnip cake. It also reminds me of my mom and making this food in Prince Rupert when I was a kid. Again, it feels like home. This visit to the Lower Mainland, I’m staying at a hotel. Normally, I would stay at my twin-bro’s place, but he was feeling under the weather.
So, this weekend has been a splurge. I’m staying at a hotel near my brother’s place… and near the location of which I booked a massage/spa session. OMG. I tried a massage last winter with my friends. It was intense. A bit of wincing, thus I am surprised that I booked another session at a different location. It was also a different massage package too. Whoa. I think I fell asleep a couple of times. I never experienced something like that before and it was exactly what I wanted (and needed). It was 90-minutes of pure relaxation. It was interesting to notice that my mind was fully activated at the beginning of the session, then I was focused on the massage, then… I was asleep. LOL. What a perfect way to spend my Saturday (aka., be a person day) morning. The experience was pure luxury and joy. I just LOVED it.
One thought that passed through my mind during the massage was… my mom would have loved a massage. She would have NEVER done something like this. She was so frugal and every thing was for everyone else. She never tended to her needs. She ALWAYS focussed on everyone else. She wore clothes that were way too big for her because they were clothes that were more than 20-years old. She might have splurged on a pair of shoes, but they were likely on sale. I admired her stamina to save money and make something out of nothing. It was somewhat incredible and admirable. She held everything together. Now that she’s gone, I noticed (over time) that she was the heart of our family. Ever since, we’ve made efforts to connect as a family, but it’s not quite the same. Coming to Burnaby is a time to restore and reboot.
After my massage, I had dim sum at the Neptune and then met up with my twin-bro. He is feeling better. We roamed around the mall and picked up small gift for my aunt. She planned a birthday party and it was a big Chinese dinner at a restaurant with 65 friends and family. Five huge round tables of people and the food was incredible. It was wonderful to reconnect with family and I was really happy for my aunt to celebrate LIFE with friends and family… and to celebrate her. It was amazing and cup filling. My aunt just wants to make a connection, and she did. I had a really good time. Today, included breakfast at the hotel (one of my favourite things to do, even though it’s included), chilling in my hotel room lying diagonally on the king size bed, and passively watching the Brier semi-finals on TSN (because I don’t get this channel).
Whew… does it get any better than this? Yes, it does. I’m blogging, I hope to get through my emails (and get crap off my desktop), and I have snacks and leftovers to eat in my hotel room. I LOVE this slowing down (while the Brier is on). I can’t watch the game too closely. It would stress me out. LOL. This afternoon, I’m meeting up with my siblings to go to happy hour downtown Vancouver, then I’m going to Gabor Maté at the Queen Elizabeth Theatre as a VIP ticket holder. I get to meet Gabor in a pre-session and take a picture with him, then go to the evening event near the front rows to listen to him talk. Now, that’s splurgy… for me. I bought the ticket before I bought my house, but no regrets. Gabor Maté’s books have resonated with me. I’ve been listening to his books online and the stories he shares are incredibly compelling.
So, when folks ask me if I am in Vancouver for business or pleasure… I’m here for me… for pleasure!! PS. I even went out on Friday night with a friend of mine who was in Metrotown… for business. I enjoyed the serendipity of our meeting. They sent me a food pic to make me jelly… and I said, I’m going there too. LOL. Life is so fun!!
Written by Christine Ho Younghusband, March 09th, 2025 | Comments Off on Nothing Wrong with a Reboot
