The Other Side

I believe I have posted this photo before. I’ve just cleaned out my office… post-dissertation. Not a lot of garbage, but lots of recycling. It took me all day to sort through my stuff, dust, and move the furniture around. I was trying to keep with the ideals of KonMari… to create a working and learning space that would foster JOY. Many things remained the same in my office, but I definitely made room for my “new” degree to go on the wall and there is less clutter on my desk, shelves, and floor.

This feels good to have my office in working order. Clear the clutter and clear the mind. It was an excellent process and I would highly encourage others to do the same, particularly if/when you have completed a dissertation. You don’t realized where you were until you see and hold artifacts of where you were. It’s weird because I believe my dissertation is straightforward. What I realized post-purge is, it was not.

That’s why I think this picture is perfect for this blog post. It’s messy, but this “artifact” was a turning point in my doctoral journey. At this time, I had collected my data and done some analysis, but had to put it all together. It was that day when I found out that my father-in-law passed away. I was out of town in Vancouver at a conference and my husband was back in my hometown with his family. That night, I stayed in my hotel room and doodled my dissertation together… although it may not seem like it.

I am grateful for artifacts like this. It keeps me humble. I may have purged much of what I had that led up to my final draft of my dissertation, but I did keep a few artifacts around to remind me of the journey to get where I am. Now, I am faced with another mess… “So, what are you going to do now, Christine?” There is no end point to any journey. If you’re done one thing, it’s common to here… so what’s next?

It’s been 9-years since I was working on my dissertation. 2-years of course work, 3-years of figuring out my WHY and my research question, and 4-years to complete my dissertation. It’s shocking to think about how long I was working on this, but it’s also amazing to think about what I have learned. I would not trade that in for anything. My dissertation brought me solace, my Oral Defence was validating, and my desire to write a book on Math Stories is aligned to my purpose and part of my next steps.

Thinking about what I would do next was a distractor for me during the dissertation process. I had to come to terms with my purpose at the time, which was to answer my research question. Now that I am on the other side, I need to consider my options and opportunities. I did apply to several places prior to my oral defence. At that time, I was looking at opportunity. What I should be looking for is ALIGNMENT… which is ironically the title of my upcoming TEDxWestVancouverEd talk this September.

I definitely want to teach. I love the creative process in teaching and orchestrating ways to facilitate learning. I definitely want to write and publish articles to hone my writing skills but also honour my research and share some of my findings with others. I definitely want freedom and flexibility. I would love to continue with research and how it connects to practice. I have a few tasks to complete this fall and would love to partake in research and implement recommendations as it relates to my research.

So, I’m back in the mess again… what will I do next? I did not know it, but when I look at the direction I am heading towards… it’s research, public speaking, and teaching. There is no question that EDUCATION is at the heart of what I do, but I have to true to myself. When I left teaching almost 7-years ago, that was my first inkling that I did not want to be a school principal anymore. I wanted to be a school principal for many years. It’s was a turning point in my career in public schools and future trajectory.

Truth, I don’t need to be the leader in name or position. I have no desire to, as proven in previous experiences and decisions. Being the president, the head of something, or organizational leader is not my main motivator. Teaching and learning motivate me. Enhancing student learning experiences (and my own) captures my attention. Asking questions, creating something new, and playing are the best aspects of what I do. I lead from within and I know things can be better for students. We just have to try.

I will end my blog entry today with a serendipitous experience I had not too long ago. I had posted my “dissertation completion” on my Facebook account (again) and one of my former Math 12 students liked my post. Classic cyberstalking, I checked his Facebook account to see what he was up to. He’s an engineer working in Alaska. Wow. I was touched that he liked my post (as I am when any of my former students reconnect with me on social media). That same day, I was heading into Vancouver via transit to visit my parents. Who do I see on the bus? This student. Soooo crazy!!!

I’m thinking he’s in Alaska… not on the West Vancouver Blue Bus. He tapped me on the shoulder and said hello… “I thought it was you… your bookmark gave you away.” I was re-reading George Couros’s “The Innovator’s Mindset” with a geometry set 60-30 right triangle ruler as my bookmark. We chatted about my dissertation, former students, and what he was up to. Of course, we ended our conversation with… “So, what are you going to do next?” I said, I’m not sure… maybe this, maybe that.

He said, “You have better ways to spend your time. You’re a doctor now. You should be screaming on top of the mountain.” I like that metaphor and I was so inspired that my former student can see the potential in me and my work. He we so supportive of me writing and publishing. I’m sure that he will hold me to task on getting published. That is my short term plan… complete another study, write some articles to publish, and present at conferences. I hope my long term plan is aligned to this as well.