It’s all in the name
October 22, 2026 – Learning more about myself
Of course I have to blog as a moment of solace, joy, and reflection before I delve into the next “thing to do.” It’s been unbelievable this month in terms of workload, timelines, and expectations. There are some wins, and some losses. I don’t want to get too down on myself, but rather take one step at a time and know that things will work out in the end. I’ve just completed a whole bunch of tasks and I have to jump into another HUGE task (that’s now overdue). Before I do, I had to get things off my desktop, organize my planner, and blog a little. As I am doing this transition-ritual, I am filled with hope, optimism, and a new mindset of what’s possible. Hence, my name. I’m showing you a screenshot of part of my Chinese name that my sister has been learning more about from my aunties, cousins, and niece. I love that she is looking into our Chinese names. I don’t speak Chinese, and admittedly, I have not had the huge motivation to learn more about it. I feel almost language-deaf to the words. I’ve been listening to Chinese my whole life, but I don’t recognize many words except for good morning, thank you, watermelon, and shrimp dumpling. Over the last handful of years, I’ve become more curious about my ethnic heritage. Learning more about my Chinese name has brought me some solace.
When I was growing up, I had always believed that my name meant “quiet” and “pretty.” I have a twin brother and our Chinese names sound similar. His name, I believed, meant “strong” and “masculine.” Sadly, it’s like “sweet and sour chicken balls”… it’s not quite right. There is a nuance with language that needs to be understood. Someone like me who does not have the language cannot understand the nuance, and for those who do have the language, it’s not easy to translate its meaning into English. It was good for me to know that my dad had a big part in how my twin bro and I were named. There had to be an interplay between our names. At first glance, there seems to be one… “quiet” versus “strong.” But, there’s more… my dad also set the task for my grandmother (his mom) to research names and consult with community. I found that also interesting because I’ve always held the belief that I was the unexpected twin. Knowing that there was great effort made by my dad and grandmother to ensure that our names had meaning meant a lot to me. I was so glad that my sister was able to find out this information and learn more about what our names mean. She is also learning more about her name too. The inspiration of this work stemmed from my mom. Before she passed away (or lost her vision), she wrote our three Chinese names on a piece of paper.
The symbol that you see above is the last of three symbols in my Chinese name. “Stillness” and “tranquility” is different from “quiet” and pretty.” The mystery continues with what my brother’s name means. His is something like staying within a set of rules or boundaries because it’s the right thing to do. This tracks because my brother is always helping people, he is very principled, and when he steps out of the box (his box)… it’s not pretty. LOL. I can see how we may have originally interpreted his name as “strong”… when really he is “doing the right thing” to benefit others. He is always helping people. I would not say that he is a people pleaser, but rather, he is a peacekeeper. He avoids conflicts, and he’s just an all around good guy. Everybody loves him… and that’s not an over exaggeration. He’s a good person. As for me, my name interplays with his. My name does not mean that I am still or tranquil, but rather I need things around me (and maybe within me) to be still and tranquil before I get anything done. HELLO. That’s what I just did (and am doing). I need the dust to settle to recalibrate to get to the next task. I always thought that I did things one thing at a time, which is true. I also need stillness and tranquility. In other words, I need things “out of my box” to get things done.
I think this is why my brother and I get along so well. In many ways, we had always thought that we were opposites… and in many ways, I can see why that is true. But now knowing my name, our names, we are actually complements. And for that, I’m grateful.