Provoked Feelings
It doesn’t matter how much time has passed… it doesn’t matter how many good things that happen to you… When you don’t deal with your ‘bad feelings’ and exercise forgiveness… those ‘bad feelings’ will present themselves in the most expected times. It just happened yesterday. Too spooky. I am just in the middle of preparing my IGNITE35 PowerPoint presentation. I have to scroll through many photos and select the “right ones” to make 3 or 4 points in 5 minutes and 20 slides. I became reminiscent of my students and the relationships I had with them, but also reminded of my frustrations and reasons for leaving public education as a teacher and where I am going now. I wish the road is straightforward and clear, but it’s not.
Anyway, completing the script for my IGNITE35 presentation has been on my mind for quite some time. I want to focus on students and student learning. Last night, old feelings were provoked. With conversations with my #bcedchat co-mod colleagues on Google hangout and participating in #bcedchat, I got somewhat agitated, much like I was 5-10 years ago. Last night’s #bcedchat topic was “Encouraging Risk-Taking.” It was so clear to me during the Google Hangout conversation that there are many reasons why teachers/educators in the system hesitate to take risks in schools, thus a topic for discussion on how to encourage risk-taking in schools. I got annoyed. It had nothing to do with the #bcedchat co-mod team or the #bcedchat Twitter convo. I was just provoked and realized that some of my ‘bad feelings’ are unresolved.
On the one hand, these ‘bad feelings’ give me purpose. On the other hand, I can’t move forward if I am holding onto these ‘bad feelings’ or beliefs. I resented the fact that taking risks in education was poo-pooed on or shunned… and it still is. How do we get our students to become thoughtful and strategic risk takers in school and in life if those who are teaching them, leading them, or even governing them cannot do it themselves? The objective is to benefit student learning and student success. How do we do that if we cannot be vulnerable enough to do so? Frustrating. And when you do take a risk… a shaming process takes place to coerce you to concede, comply, or conform. Or, risk-taking becomes such a daunting task, why bother?
We want our teachers (and students) to be creative and autonomous. Taking risks is a part of the learning process. Sometimes it could be easily spinned to keep with the status quo… “this is how we’ve always done it” and “it ain’t broke, why fix it?” UGH. Or sometimes innovation or change is put upon you… why? That does not make me a risk-taker if I am assigned to do something else. What’s the why? I am not suggesting change for the sake of change. More horrible is changing and not knowing why you are changing. That would be completely meaningless. What I am saying is, if we want our students to be extraordinary, engaged, and in love with learning, then everyone in the education system has to emulate that expectation. That’s it.
No one is striving to be mediocre, average, or ordinary. A growth mindset… a culture of learning… and taking risks…. ARE ALL ALIGNED. Let’s be open to possibilities instead of hiding ourselves from failure, judgement, or shame. It’s sometimes disappointing thinking about how it could be and how it is. I encourage everyone who is a stakeholder or involved in education to TAKE A RISK… try something new… and fail, if you must… as long as the risk has the potential of benefitting student learning and promoting student success. You will never know unless try… and it is next to impossible to anticipate all probable outcomes before proceeding. That’s paralysis. Exercise your autonomy. Be collegial. Encourage Risk-Taking.