Gratitude as a Practice

August 24, 2022 – Second Submission

Here we go… the mid-week blog post on education. I will say, this post might be more about learning. Aren’t the two terms synonymous? Maybe that was a rhetorical question, but I said it. Anyway, I cannot believe how good I feel. I am so grateful. As I’m developing my practice in writing, I’m also honing in my practice for gratitude. Here is my second submission and I’m totally stoked. I feel Ike I’ve turned the corner and I’m ready to run forward. Forget about just moving forward. I’m running. Watch me go.

Every moment is working towards the future you want for yourself. But to get there, you have to celebrate and savour the moment. I am so grateful for the work I’ve done this spring and summer terms. Honestly, I think that I’ve been always working on this but now I see it, believe it, and want it. My drive and my desire (aka. My Why) it at the centre of who I am and who I want to be. I can see it, finally. I have moments and look back at how life was and remember how I felt. I was so numb. I was hiding. I was broken. Now I feel alive, excited, and true to myself.

Gosh. I’m blogging from my phone, I’m so exited to blog. I’ve finally found some clarity in my work and what I want to write about. Something that I’ve held onto was written in one day, submitted, and copy edited. I did not hesitate to read the feedback, I was excited. And dang, it was all minor changes. Mainly formatting. Woohoo. I had 1-2 weeks to return the short paper and nope… less than 60-minutes from when the email was sent to me reading and accepting all changes. I feel so validated in the work that I’m doing and I’m getting positive feedback from the field. What I needed to do was to find the courage to write, put my authentic self forward, and send.

I am so grateful for the feedback and I know that someone wen out of their way to provide me feedback so that I can become a better person and writer. There is nothing more exciting than getting the work that I get to do. In the right state of mind, I’ve re-read the scholarly expectations of my department and I saw myself. That’s never happened to me before. I could see my work “fitting” into these expectations without having to compromise myself or pretending to be something I’m not. The Scholarship of Teaching… is my jam.

The sad or sorry part of this story is that someone was trying to tell me this 1-year ago. Omg. I didn’t even understand what that person was saying to me. The person said, “my work is my research”… and that “I’m doing the research.” What was this person talking about. I’ve wrestled with this and had moments of understand, but now I get it. Another person asked me almost 4-years ago, “if you are a professor, then what are you professing?” Another person said to me, “90% completion of 10 papers does not equal to 9 papers.” Oh man… another person said to me “be selfish… you will not advance in your work.” Another person said, “do what you want to do.”

There are so many more things that has been said to me and it didn’t make sense… until now? I find that bewildering but I am creating what I want to see. This is a big idea. Trust is key. One step at a time is critical. Staying focused on what’s important to me matters. I’m done with betraying myself. My work is worthwhile. The only person I’m impressing is myself and right now I’m exceeding expectations. I’m blowing my mind. I need to embrace this moment… with gratitude… like the photo in this blog. I got a cookie and an orange juice on the plane today. The flight attendant came back to me and asked if I wanted the rest of the can. I said yes. If made my day. A beautiful metaphor for today.