Christine Ho Younghusband

The Tipping Point

TRUST and ALLOW has been my new mantra for the last short while.  Often I seem to bounce from idea to idea without letting something stew and grow into it’s fullest potential.

This is like Malcolm Gladwell’s, THE TIPPING POINT, where unsuspecting events escalate exponentially into something unimaginable and wonderful.  Am I approaching a tipping point?

I am beginning to feel this way about my dissertation and my “new” academic/professional adventures.  The momentum is building.  I am getting feedback.  I am driven to write and revise.  I am building my tutoring clientele.  I am taking risks.  I am open to new opportunities.

Today, I just received notice that I got one of the site assistant positions at SFU to work with a Masters of Education cohort at SFU (Surrey) focused on Educational Leadership K-12.  It is a modest beginning but I am 100% stoked about what I am going learn and contribute.

Life is about taking risks and allowing the cards to fall where they should be.  I like the advice I got from my Educ 809 professor who said, “Don’t say no to opportunities, let them say no.”  In the end, if THEY (who ever “they” are) say NO, then nothing changes.  Resume.

If they say yes… accept… trust… allow… Who knows what comes next.  That’s the surprise.

Procrastination

Oh man… who is suffering from procrastination?  I am.  You’d think that it would be due to a lack of interest or a lack of motivation.  I can certainly see one can assume that would be a primary cause for procrastination.  For me, that is not the case.  I could have too many things to do and I’m easily distracted with other things to do (like this blog) as other viable reasons for procrastination.  Unfortunately, my reason for procrastination is FEAR… fear of the unknown and fear of failure.  What a crazy thought… FEAR.  As I begin to jump into new adventures academically, personally, and professionally… I get completely freaked out about what’s to come.  I have lived most of my life in a particular way.  Let’s be honest here… when curling is my sport of choice… I like predictability, strategic outcomes, and teamwork.

In a couple of days I will be presenting at the SFU EGSA (Education Graduate Students Association) Seminar Series.  I need to prep a 20-30 minute presentation for a group of “strangers” that will be broadcasted online.  As much as I am passionate about my topic and I am excited I am about trying something new, I am totally paralyzed by the upcoming event.  I have never presented my academic work publicly and I recently received feedback from my supervisors.  I have shared my doctoral work with acquaintances and I love the fact I got feedback, but I am a little wary about starting off the 2011/2012 seminar series.

I guess all I can do is the best I can, report out my current progress, and make considerations to my thesis after the presentation.  Bottom line, my fear comes from the notion of being judged.  It almost seems like an automatic reaction or embedded conditioning from schooling… perform and get evaluated.  This is very anti-Assessment for Learning.  How ironic.  I know that I am not being evaluated, but an opportunity to share my thoughts to the Faculty of Education academic community.  In turn, I will embrace the EGSA Seminar Series and put myself out there.  I must face my fears and false beliefs… just go for it.

Thank you BLOGGIES for reading and empathizing.  Must go now and prep…

The Canoe

Yesterday, I had the unique opportunity to go paddle with members of the Gibsons Paddle Club who signed up to learn how to steer and skip the canoe.  I feel so fortunate to be invited to participate as an observer and puller.  What was I observing?  I was watching how adults learn.  This was a chance to glean on some ideas that may relate to my dissertation.

OK.  I understand that there are many articles and books that focus on adult learning in addition to many workshops intentionally designed to cater adult learners.  By observing experienced paddlers taking the next step to learn how to skip, I wanted to understand why they were taking the workshop and what they intended to learn from the workshop.

This is what I would call taking the tacit to the explicit.  To take what I do and see and be able to articulate it with a length literature review is my personal challenge that I intend to tackle.  I have engaged in the SFU Instructional Skills Workshop (ISW) as an adult learner, I have presented to Pemberton Secondary as an adult educator, and now I have participated in a steering workshop as an observer.  Three points of view on adult learning, the question is, what do I really want to report on?  This is the underpinning of the research question.

It sounds silly, but I do need to establish a goal or point I wish to obtain with my dissertation.  Although I can report on very interesting and overlapping attributes of adult learning, in general, but how can I relate what I have learned to what I want to research?  This has been my burning question from the start.  My topic is good, my focus could be better.

The canoe has been an awesome learning vehicle for me and my dissertation.  Two years ago, I could not even announce myself as an EdD Candidate until I had participated in Pulling Together.  I was a candidate for more than 7 months.  I could not adhere to the ideas of being an autodidactic learner until I had paddled in 2010.  I could not understand my strengths and weaknesses until I engaged with canoe and my crew members.

Blah, blah, blah… and the story goes on.  There are many lessons to be learned from the Canoe.  I have given only broad generalizations as to how the Canoe benefited my learning… academically, professionally, and personally.  I can only imagine what the Canoe can do to benefit others.  The Canoe is alive and well.  She is a kind spirit always willing to help.

Fermenting

FERMENTING… to make turbulent; excite or agitate.  This is the word of the day.

Do you ever go through your day and someone says something by chance, like a key word or phrase, that resonates with you?  Yesterday, I went to the dentist for a check up.  The classic question that always comes up when I go to the dentist or dental hygienist is, “do you floss?”  Unfortunately, my answer is NO.  I would often encourage the dental practitioners to lecture me on why to floss.  And, so they did.  I’d hear the hygienist’s arguments, pros and cons, but nothing seemed to stick until yesterday.  The dentist said his 2-cents and convinced me to change.  All that he said was, “the bacteria are fermenting between your teeth.”  BLAH.  The floss lecture continued with explaining why gums bleed and how it will alleviate itself within 6 days.  That was reassuring.  Honestly, knowing that something is FERMENTING in my mouth turned me right around.  This morning, I flossed my teeth.

So, why even blog about fermenting?  I am not about to share my personal hygiene habits to the world wide web without having some point to share that is meaningful.  Let’s cross our fingers that what I am about to say is worthwhile… meh, I’m not worried.  It is definitely something to consider.  Lately, I feel fortunate to have the time to sit and ponder my life, my studies, and my way of being.  Yes, this may seem like a midlife situation… and, it is… but, I am beginning to believe that not only are we in control of what we see… I am also convinced that our surroundings or experiences are sending us messages to learn from.

Does this sound creepy?  It does to me.  Yet, it seems to tie in so nicely to what I am experiencing right now.  FERMENTING TEETH… yuck… pooey… do something about it.  Get the information that you need and make a choice.  To floss or not to floss?  That was my question.  And, I made a choice.  I wanted something different for myself.  I am motivated to changed and feel excited about it.  I could have opted not to listen (as I did in previous appointments) or mull over it as a possibility (as I did from previous appointments, once again).  By not enacting, nothing changes.  As a result, I would end up reliving the floss-lecture over and over again at the dentist office until I learned from it… to better myself.

Here’s the lesson… you will be presented with the same things in your life repeatedly until you make the “right” choices in yourself to change what you see.  That is a big lesson I am adhering to and attempting to be attuned to my surroundings so that I can make the “right” choices to move forward.  I am fermenting.  Not just in my mouth, but with my dissertation, my career, and my life.  For example, last night I purchased a life jacket for paddling.  This is a HUGE purchase (or investment) and I wanted to make sure I made the “right” choice.  My head was in a spin last night… is this the right size, right colour, or should I just borrow one from a friend (… again).  This morning, I proceeded with the head spin until I opted to go back to the sports store to try on some other life jackets.  I felt some closure.  I made the “right” purchase and absolutely confident I made the “right” choice.  My head stopped spinning.

So, here is my advice.  If you find yourself self-doubting… or if you find yourself hesitating because you can find a million reasons why “you can’t”… GO FOR IT.  You never know, unless you try (how cliche).  Question your false beliefs.  And, if you screw up… no worries… that just means that it was not the “right” choice and there are an infinite number of other choices to make.  When it feels good… not forced… and surprisingly unexpected… BINGO.  The fermenting process has ceased.  By not enacting, nothing will change and your thoughts will continue to persist.  You have a choice.  Check it out.  You might be pleasantly surprised.

Meant to Be

Do you ever wonder if things happen for a reason?  I do.  I am beginning to wonder if I am in control of what’s happening.  Lately, I’m witnessing events that seem more like intended outcomes and not coincidence.  I am learning how to listen to my intuition and understanding what is authentic.  I have a short-term goals… one being convocation in 2012, the other being 30 lbs lighter.  As for long term goals, I am pretty open to anything that is related to education.  I have a vision, but I’m not sure of the details.  It’s pretty much a guess and check process, but “feels good” is the right direction, vice versa.

Let’s take today as a snapshot.  Depending on your frame of mind, it could be perceived as “good news” or “bad news.”  As far as I am concerned, it’s all good news.  Good things come is three.  First, I received an email from my senior supervisor acknowledging my biweekly update email.  This is great news.  Second, I found out I have a cavity. Initially, the dentist did not find anything, but we updated my X-rays and, by chance, he found one.  This was apparently lucky.  Finally, I found out today that I did not get the position I interviewed for a few days ago.  I could have been upset, but I wasn’t.  Instead, I feel excited about what’s to come.  I look forward to working on my dissertation, being a part of my daughter’s school experience, and being open to other educational opportunities.  What I learned is that my resume and cover letter are worthy of an interview AND my interview conveyed what I wanted: I am energetic, enthusiastic, and care deeply for student learning.  The best thing is that I used the interview experience as part of my Assessment for Learning presentation.  I believe that I was meant to interview to gain a deeper understanding of what I am presenting.

I guess this could be considered as REFRAMING… but I’m thinking that it was meant to be.  Regardless of what has happened, I have something to learn.  I am learning.  I can obsess about not having the time to food shop or clean the house today.  Instead, I choose to celebrate the fact I got a hair appointment for tomorrow and have the opportunity to write in my blog to express myself.  Let’s take it a step further, my feet are cold right now as I lie here on the couch… but I think it’s time for a hot bath after I blog.  In the end, it’s all good.

AFL at Pemberton Secondary

What a day… I am so thankful to have friends in Squamish to spend the night before heading off to Pemberton, BC.  My good friend made me a latte and presented me with a slice of banana bread with Nutella before I headed north.  I did not realize that it would take me more than an hour to arrive at Pemberton Secondary… and what a beautiful school.  The surroundings are quite spectacular too.  Nonetheless, I made it to the school on time (surprisingly) and immediately felt at home.  What a friendly bunch considering the teaching staff and administrators are engaging in professional development before school starts.

This Assessment for Learning (AFL) workshop was special to me for several reasons.  First, this will be my third time returning back to the School District No.48 (Sea-to-Sky) talking about assessment.  You’d think that these people would get bored with me.  Apparently, only 2 of 20 had seen me before at the District Professional Development day at Don Ross Secondary.  Whew.  I didn’t want to sound like the same old, same old.  Second, I got the opportunity to apply what I had learned from the Instructional Skills Workshop (ISW) at SFU.  I spent a significant amount of time focusing on the learning outcomes, changing my powerpoint, and how I could include active learning into the 3-hour session.  I was also curious how I would do.  This wasn’t practice teaching time anymore.  Third, I had one learning outcome to achieve… to finish my presentation on time.  I’ve done about a half dozen workshops and only one of them finished on-time.  I needed some closure.

The results… the workshop was PHENOMENAL.  I had a great time.  People were engaged.  They asked good questions.  They were honest and genuinely curious.  I got group discussion, small group discussion, and excellent FORMATIVE feedback throughout my presentation.  I had so much fun implementing what I had learned from ISW.  I used a stop watch.  I had clear learning objectives.  I used my own personal experiences as “the hook” at the beginning of the workshop, during group discussion, and as my closing remarks.  If anything, I think I got them thinking about their assessment practices, how it reflects on their course outlines, and opportunities to question current practices that may hinder Assessment for Learning practices.  Bottom line, WAY TOO COOL to see collegial dialogue in action.  LOVED IT.  To top it off, they gave me a parting gift and lunch.

What an amazing experience.  Teachers and administrators pulled me aside to ask specific questions about their practice and how they could include AFL to improve student learning.  It was awesome to be a part of their problem solving process and I truly feel that the Pemberton Secondary teaching staff is on their way to implementing AFL as it was intended.  Very inspirational.  Furthermore, I mixed and mingled with the Pemberton staff during lunch to be unexpectedly flowered with more FORMATIVE FEEDBACK.  I was ENGAGING… KNOWLEDGEABLE… and GROUNDED.  Wow.  Could I ask for anything more?  Oh yes, my contact person offered to read parts of my dissertation work and give me feedback.  It’s all happening at once and it feels good.  A peer reviewer… she’s signed up and ready to go. 

Along with a fantastic drive to and from Pemberton on the Sea-to-Sky highway, visiting with old friends in Squamish (and much enjoyed reconnecting with them on the way back home), and returning back to SD48 (Sea-to-Sky) to talk about Assessment for Learning… I had a wonderful time at Pemberton Secondary.  It is a beautiful area, filled with beautiful people.  I am very fortunate to be a part of your pedagogical journey.  THANK YOU.

FYI.  I will be returning to SD48 (Sea-to-Sky) on November 4th to present at the District Professional Development Day in Whistler, BC.  Looking forward.

Thank Goodness for Friends

Often I get inspired to write about something I just experienced or witnessed that was unique or noteworthy.  Sometimes I go with my intuition.  When I start writing and there is “no flow,” I know immediately that it is not the right topic.  Today, I was busy prepping for the workshop in Pemberton, making travel arrangements, and plans for my family during my absence.

I started to write in the blog several times today, but got stumped.  Quarter after midnight, it dawned on me… I needed to write about my friends.  Please make note, I am extending my definition of “friends” to not only my friends, but also to my family, acquaintances, and people who I will meet along the way.  I meet the right people at the right times and I am grateful.

My friends always pull through for me and it’s AMAZING.  Just today alone… one friend interviewed me for my research project; another friend picked up my yearbook; another friend offered to babysit my kid; another friend picked up supplies for my workshop tomorrow; another friend problem solved my travel arrangements; another friend booked a tutoring time; another friend gave me an opportunity to speak at the university; another friend allowed me to stay in her home overnight; another friend made me a latte; another friend served me dinner; another friend helped arrange the small details for the workshop tomorrow… hello?  Was this a long list of AWESOMENESS?  I am so lucky to have so many awesome friends.

This lengthy list is only acknowledging what happened today… and I can already think of a few more friends who helped me out… like one friend who is helping me organize; another friend who listened to my story; another friend with children who played with my kid; and, another friend who complimented my kid at the store by saying, “She is a nice girl.” 

Honestly, if I continue to brainstorm, I bet I could think of a half a dozen more wonderful things about my friends.  Thank goodness for friends.  I am so fortunate to have so many people in my life who are generous, caring, and willing to lend a helping hand.  I hope that all of you Bloggies (aka. friends) can think of as many friends who make your day a little better just because they are your friends.  Not to get all sappy and cry… but THANK YOU everyone.

Candle Light

The most wonderful compliment I received was from my facilitator from the Instructional Skills Workshop.  She is extremely intuitive, which can be quite frightening for someone like myself who is an ESTJ (extroverted, sensing, thinking, judging) from Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI).  Intuition seems spooky to ESTJ’s who gather information from the five senses, but I do like listening to it.  My facilitator is more like a mentor.  I am so lucky to have met her.

My facilitator was reading my like a book.  I revealed only a few things about me during the workshop and she seemed to understand me.  We had wonderful conversations and I feel extremely fortunate to have her as my “fearless leader” during the workshop.  She is an expert in her field.  I have great respect for her and I adored her honesty and sense of humour.  In one conversations, she said to me… “I’m a candle light in the darkness.”  She said her job was to find the light and ensure each one stays lit.  Hello?  She fired me up. 

I felt reassured and validated in so many ways.  By the end of the workshop she shared three key qualities about me… my strengths really… I am so grateful to gain this insight about myself and to have someone I trust to tell me.  She said: (1) I am caring.  I truly care about what I teach and who I teach. (2)  I am knowledgeable.  I have a deep understanding of what I am passionate about.  (3) I have a VISION.  How did she know that?  I do have a vision.

Thank you.  That’s all I have is gratitude for you, MY MENTOR.  You are my hero and I can only aspire to be like you.  You have touch my heart and I promise to advocate for student learning and quality teaching.  I am proud to be a teacher and I love to learn more about my practice to improve my quality of teaching.  Thank you for recognizing my passion.

Personal Reflection

Well… It could have been better.  That is my self-assessment.  Are we our toughest critic?  Yes, I am.  I went to an job interview today and I am truly thankful for being selected as being a viable candidate for the position.  Aside from being grateful for the experience, I could have done a lot better.  After the one-hour interview, I spent the next 5 hours self-critiquing my responses… Ooh, I could have given a better answer… Ugh, I could have given a specific example… Duh, I could have said this word instead of that word… and so on.

The post-interview self-talk is not enjoyable or even logical.  Apparently, it’s normal.  On the positive side… I was myself and I felt comfortable talking to the interview panel about myself and my accomplishments.  My only regret was not being specific with each and every question.  That’s what trying new things out does… making mistakes and learning from them.  The only wish I have is having the opportunity to get constructive feedback from members of the panel as to what went well and what I need to work on… aka. Assessment for Learning.

Not to promote what I endorse… Assessment for Learning ROCKS… but, I truly enjoyed the Instructional Skills Workshop (ISW) at SFU for this very reason.  At ISW, feedback was immediate.  What was said by peers and facilitator was constructive, insightful, and informative.  Participants had to self-reflect after each session with the facilitator while the peer group formulated a feedback response.  More times than none, I was somewhat critical of my performance.  The feedback I received would often exceed my expectations.

Anyway, I’m not sure if this applies to my interview or not.  What’s done is done.  I can’t go back in time or have a “redo” interview.  All I can do is ask for some feedback and hope for the best.  Now, it’s off to the next thing… prep of a workshop I’m delivering at Pemberton Secondary this Wednesday regarding Assessment for Learning and creating course outlines.  The best part is that I get to use what I learned from ISW to this workshop. Yay me.

Getting Ready

Have you ever done something that is so new… so exciting… that you just can’t breathe?  Hello.  Here I am.  I am going in for an interview.  The last time I had interviewed was in 1994… well, and a couple of other times while in the school district… but this is an opportunity for employment.  I feel like a kid again… looking for what I want to do when I grow up and I am totally stoked about what this position has to offer me.  I am so grateful to have the opportunity to interview.  That is excellent feedback on my resume/cover letter writing.  Now, I am heading into the next phase… the interview phase.  I did prepare and got great advice from friends.  I am not sure what to expect and how I will perform.  All that I know is that I want to portray myself authentically and know that I am the best person for the job.  We’ll see… I am optimistic and would love to work with this “company.”  Wish me luck.