Not Enough Time

Oh my goodness… where does the time go?  Does that sound familiar?  It’s not to say that I feel over worked.  I’ve been pretty busy all day, but have been keeping a good pace.  What I do feel is under appreciated.  The day begins by… getting up, getting ready, making sure the kid is up and ready, making breakfast and lunch, dropping kid off at school… racing back home to clean the kitchen… leaving home to tutor, go to the library, and food shopping… returning home to tutor some more, make dinner, tutor, eat dinner, tutor… and here I am.  A brief moment of time for myself… time to rest, pay bills and balance the budget… and possibly get some of my own stuff done (after cleaning up after dinner and doing the laundry) such as reading and writing.  NOPE.  The train keeps moving…

I was squeezed out of my place of solace (in front of the fireplace) to blog (and rant) upstairs alone in my office.  I guess this is one way to get working in my office, but man… I’m beginning to realize that there is not enough time.  Regardless of how much I have accomplished today I feel somewhat disappointed.  I have so much more to get done today and all I feel is a bit of anger and frustration.  This is not a good head space to be when I should be spending time with family. SIGH.  Where is “My Happiness Project” book?  I need to reassess.  What’s important to me?  Lots of things are… like supporting my family, my studies, my career, my well-being.  Where does it stop?  I’ve been saying “no” a lot (i.e. curling), but maybe it’s not enough.  What’s strange is that I thought I was doing all of these things to benefit myself, but in return I think that I’m losing myself in the process.

LIFE BALANCE… from too much time to not enough time… and the pendulum swings.  Is it possible to have it all?  A huge part of me says YES, why not?  A small part of me says MANAGE YOUR TIME, you’re nuts.  OK.  I can take a hint.  One step at a time… and plow forwards.  Time is money.