Christine Ho Younghusband

Congee Comfort

Here I sit in front of the fireplace eating a hot bowl of pork congee.  Congee is a rice porridge.  It’s a savoury bowl of comfort.  Last night, we had pork roast for dinner.  Normally, I make chicken congee… but why not pork?  Let me tell you… it’s delicious.  I must admit, it has taken me about 8 years to master this asian dish.  It was 8 years well invested.  The weather today was wet and windy, a classic fall day, sitting alone… blogging… with a big bowl of congee comfort has made my day.  Happy October.

Starting All Over Again

Oh my goodness… revisiting my dissertation proposal for the n-th time feels like starting all over again.  I am building a great respect for those doctoral candidates who finished their dissertations in a timely manner.  Thoughts have to be clear and direction focused.  Can you see my problem?

I have an awesome topic.  I think that I am writing purposefully, but in the end, I am not.  I often feel like I am “writing” into a wall and can’t seem to walk around it.  I sit here almost one year later contemplating the approach to my topic.  In the end, it ends up somewhere else.  Is this where I want to be?

With each step forward, leads to two steps back… I am beginning to wonder what my motivation to finish is.  I get frustrated.  I think that I am learning, but I believe that I am running out of steam.  It is only brief moments from inspiration, like TedxSechelt, that makes venturing out into academia worthwhile.  Come on number 6… I want to get out of START fast.

Happy Birthday to ME

Happy birthday to me… Happy birthday to me… Happy birthday dear ME… Happy birthday to me.

Finally.  I am well into my 40’s.  I am 41.  How did my birthday go?  I slept in.  I made a big breakfast for my family.  We ate outside.  It was sunny.  We had cake after breakfast.  I cleaned up the kitchen, baked banana muffins, and ate sushi leftovers.  Shared a special moment with my daughter, a good friend, and a little bird.  I cleaned the rest of the house, went for a walk, and chatted with my parents on the phone.  And, went out for Chinese smorgasbord dinner, but really wanted Vietnamese, with family and friend.  I end my day with Facebook birthday thank yous and blogging.

Still to come… dissertation work, a hot bath, and putting my daughter to bed… a very nice day.

TedxSechelt

This my last day of being 40.  I am not being sentimental… I am being thankful.  What a year… Turning 40 was more than I anticipated.  This blog entry will be a year in review.  I am so grateful to end my 40th year of life with TedxSechelt.  I feel so lucky to be a part of this event.  I saw good friends and left the all-day event inspired and affirmed… This is a good feeling.

So, how did my 40th year of life start out?  In 2 words… NOT GOOD.  For several weeks prior to my 40th birthday, I was in serious pain.  I had hip pain and had difficulties walking.  Furthermore, I had an extremely HUGE cyst growing on the side of my chest.  The cyst caused me a lot of pain that I did not show up to work the day before my birthday, where I found out later, a surprise party was being organized for me.  I could not celebrate my birthday.  I taught in agony thinking that this growth would someday disappear, much like the hip-pain would.  My health was rapidly declining.

On the morning of my 40th birthday, the baseball-sized cyst ERUPTED.  It was totally gruesome.  That Saturday I had a EdD cohort meeting on campus that was organized weeks before.  I took my daughter with me to Surrey, traveling from Sunshine Coast.  Like a “good” teacher, I pretended that everything was OK.  What a lie I was living.  I had obviously reached a turning point in my life… let’s call it MIDLIFE… My body was the final straw… I had to make life changes.

With great contemplation, I abruptly left my ‘secure’ teaching position to work full-time on my dissertation.  I worked in public schools for 16 years.  I was an icon in the school’s math department, but I was becoming attuned to the idea that I was no longer aligned with my workplace.  In time, the career I loved became a job.  I promised myself when my teaching career dwindled down to be “all about the money,” I had to leave.  So, I left.  Not an easy decision, but I was losing the love.

The next 30 days after my resignation notice were the longest 30 days of my life.  On the one hand, I was happy to take the risk to move into a different direction in life that was more attuned to my authentic self.  On the other hand, I hated leaving the kids.  I had awesome classes.  It was tough to leave them, but because all of my classes were exceptional, it was the best time to leave.  Saying goodbye to staff and students was difficult.  The next 10 months were even more difficult.

What a journey.  It has taken me about 10 months to feel OK with my HUGE life-decision.  I have started writing and rewriting my dissertation proposal.  With each revision, by perspective becomes more objective… and hopefully one day, more academic.  I’m working on it.  Anyway, what sparked the blog was a way to journal my PEDAGOGICAL JOURNEY.  And, even still, my blog has transformed several times.  The content has changed.  The blog-site address had changed.  The template has changed.  Today, I do feel good about how I am writing my blog, with nothing to hide.

I am thankful to my blog (and my Bloggies).  I am more grateful for my family, friends, and colleagues.  With any tough decision, it’s tough to know if you’re doing it alone or with a supportive posse.  I am so lucky to have the latter.  My parents, siblings, husband, daughter, students, friends, and colleagues have been phenomenal.  I could not realize my dreams without any of them.  The strangest part is that I feel more connected to people today being home alone writing compared to being in a school surrounded by hundreds.  I am fortunate.

My biggest growth has been realizing what I see is what I create.  The other life’s lesson is ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE, but you have to believe that it’s possible.  Now, back to TedxSechelt.  What an amazing event.  First of all, I had to step into the school that I taught in for 16 years of my life.  I was a bit apprehensive, but felt good.  It was an awesome litmus for forgiveness and moving on.  Second, I saw so many good friends at the event… my ‘boy friend’… my ‘mentor’… my ‘buddy’… my ‘comrade’… my ‘former student’… ‘my colleagues’… It was so wonderful see them all.  Finally, the speakers, the locally made videos, the live music, and TED presentations were incredible.  What did I walk away with?  You can live your dream.  There are no limitations.  Live willingly naive.

Aside from getting my picture with one of the TedxSechelt speakers, which was so awesome… I ended my day going out for a special sushi-birthday dinner with my little family.  It may be the day before my birthday, but my man has a hockey draft tomorrow (third year in a row… just saying) and honestly, I had no expectations.  All that I know is, I started year 40 on a low… and now, I’m ending it on a high.  My hips don’t hurt.  I have no cyst.  I FEEL GOOD.  Forgive me all for a lengthy blog today, but I feel that I am living my dream, I have no limitations, and I am open to possibilities.  Best of all, my daughter is making my birthday present, as I blog, in the other room.  That’s cool.

ABD Student

You would think that I was a PhD student… really, I am an EdD student… I’m beginning to think that I am an ABD student.  What do all these acronyms mean?  Well, here’s the break down…

PhD = Doctorate of Philosophy
EdD = Doctorate of Education
ABD = All But Dissertation

I am currently reading my third book on “The Dissertation Journey” for some solace and peace of mind.   What I am experiencing is apparently “normal” but personally, I’m done with it.  Procrastination begone.

The term “ABD” had been tossed around during my Educ 809 course and a continuance of that course, which is called ABD student meetings.  I never understood ABD meant until reading this book.  The light bulb is on.

Take for example, I am writing this blog.  I “like” doing loads of laundry and washing the dishes.  I tutor lots of students.  I give professional development workshops.  I am a bike-club mom… etc.  Classic ABD behaviour. 

Like Dr. Phil says, “You’ve got to name it, to claim it.”  I want to be Dr. Younghusband, EdD soon.  In essence, I’ve got to get of the denial train and deal with it.  Hmmm… sounds more like Dr. Phil, but it’s true.

New mantra:  JUST DO IT NOW.  Fear begone.  Albeit, starting over and over again on Chapters 1-3 is not what I call “enjoyable” but it is a part of the dissertation process.  Try, try, and try again until it’s done.  Sigh.

Municipal Election

Something to consider… running in the 2011 Municipal Election as School Trustee representing the District of Sechelt on the Sunshine Coast.

This is a HUGE decision.  To step in this direction, I would have to say ‘goodbye’ to teaching on the Sunshine Coast and say ‘hello’ to public service.  Running for school trustee and representing the constituents of the District of Sechelt would be an honour and seems to resonate with how I feel.  I am passionate about student learning, public education, and living on the Sunshine Coast. With these three factors alone, it seems like a formidable formula to run for public office as school trustee to advocate for public education as a parent, community member, and teacher.

Nominations for the 2011 Municipal election begins on October 4th.  Spread the word… Christine Younghusband is running for school trustee in the District of Sechelt to represent the families and students of School District No.46 (Sunshine Coast).  I love teaching and learning.  With 16 years experience in this school district as a public educator, studying educational leadership at SFU, and being a mom of an SD46 student, I am actively involved in education and care about quality public education.

Dear Bloggies… come November 19, 2011… VOTE FOR YOUNGHUSBAND as SD46 SCHOOL TRUSTEE representing the District of Sechelt.

Looking Forward

“Looking forward” has been a mantra I have been adhering to lately, thinking to myself… LOOK FORWARD.  As much as I am looking forward, I will periodically look back to see what I have left.  Make note, looking back is not a good strategy when trying to implement change into one’s life.  I feel like I have made “the change” but I’m not acknowledging it. 

Bare with me Bloggies… I am in the midst of writing a “gratitude list” or things that I have accomplished in the past 10 months since leaving public schools to pursue academic work, professional development, and personal growth.  To write a gratitude journal… or blog, in my case… one can easily see what is going well and what direction one is heading in.  My list…

PERSONAL
1.  I am all paid and up-to-date with my credit cards.
2.  I am cooking meals at home for my family.
3.  I am able to drop off and pick up my daughter at school.
4.  I am able to volunteer at my daughter’s school.
5.  I am a part of the WSE bike club and LOVE IT.

PROFESSIONAL
1.  I have presented 8 workshops on to practicing teachers.
2.  I am successful at giving professional development workshops.
3.  I am self-employed.
4.  I provide a math/science tutoring service that is thriving.
5.  I am a member of the BCAMT excutive committee.

ACADEMIC
1.  I presented at the SFU EGSA Speaker Series.
2.  I am a Masters of Education Site Assistant at SFU-Surrey.
3.  I have created a learning community to support my
4.  I am tutoring at Capilano University with the CALL program.
5.  I am working on my dissertation and learning as I as I go.

MISC
1.  I pulled the 2011 Pulling Together Canoe Journey.
2.  I participated in the SFU Instructional Skills Workshop.
3.  I made an elk hide drum.
4.  I celebrated 20 years with my husband/best friend.
5.  I am running for municipal government as school trustee.

Thank you for letting me purge out my list of gratitude.  There is so much more to mention (i.e. I have a wonderul husband who supports me 100% in my pedagogical journey and I am presenting at 3 more conferences this fall) but, I will leave it for now.  I am on a journey.  As much as I miss teaching in the classroom… I am still teaching and learning.  I will admit that I do get ‘spooked’ on the way and I guess that’s when I look back to see what’s behind me.  In the end, it’s looking forward that seems more exciting.

Good Teaching

Life can be full of regrets.  This is a choice.  We can dwell on them.  We get stuck, never move forwards, unable to see what’s good.  Life will always be a rain cloud.

Yesterday, I gave a workshop to a team of Aboriginal Education teachers about implementing the First Nations perspective in the mathematics curriculum.  I did not make a summary handout or feedback form like I usually do for my Assessment for Learning workshops.  I had a moment of regret when the workshop ended.  I walked out flat, not knowing how the workshop went.  I did not assume the worst but I had no idea if the teachers found the workshop worthwhile.

Mental note, provide feedback forms to ALL workshops I provide.  If I desire feedback on my performance and content, I need to provide a feedback form.  The best part about teaching… learning that is incurred when making mistakes.  No regrets… looking forward… making it better for the next time.

To my surprise, I started receiving emails from my colleagues who attended the workshop.  The first email was a general thank you to everyone… to the presenter… to the PD rep… to the participants.  That was nice to be acknowledged amongst these practitioners.  The second email was a thank you expressing her excitement to connect with math teachers.  That is so AWESOME.  I am excited for her.  The third email was from a good friend.  She said that I was a good teacher.  GASP.  That meant a lot to me.  No sarcasm.  And finally, I received an email this morning commenting on my teaching abilities, willingness to give back, and thanking me for becoming a teacher.  At this point, I have no words to describe how I feel.

At some level I knew the workshop went well.  Although I did receive hugs, smiles, and ‘thank you’s’ after the workshop, the email feedback was exceptional.  The gift is knowing that other people acknowledge my work, my love for teaching, and the quality of my teaching.  I love teaching.  It more than just saying it, it’s about living it.  Thank you for your feedback.

Math Embedded

I had a wonderful afternoon presenting a workshop to the Aboriginal Education Local Specialists Association (LSA) today.  This was a unique opportunity.  This LSA is from the Sunshine Coast school district, my hometown.  I am well acquainted with all of the Aboriginal Education teachers and district administrator.  The group was relatively small, compared to a whole teaching staff of a secondary school, and the attendees are all friends, not just colleagues.  Furthermore, I presented a ‘new’ workshop called, “Math Embedded – A Tribute to Susan Point.”

Once again, I stepped out of my box and presented to close colleagues of mine about my teaching practice as a secondary mathematics teacher implementing a First Nations approach to mathematics education during the 2009/10 Mathematics 8 curriculum implementation.  This workshop was not a workshop about Assessment for Learning (AFL), yet I managed to slip in a few words in there about assessment and evaluation with regards to the project.  I still get inspired by the dialogue that transpires when talking to teachers about assessment.  Thank you for fulfilling my AFL-fix.

What was unique about the Math Embedded workshop was that I felt so welcomed by my colleagues.  I was not nervous or anxious.  I felt a home talking about my practice candidly with hopes of inspiring each them to take the chance of working with a mathematics educator and integrate First Nations culture and perspective with the curriculum.  I was so pleased to observe my colleagues actively and willingly partake in the workshop by making their own Tribute to Susan Point and sharing their creations and thoughts to the group.  What each participant created was both beautiful and reflective of each individual.  Thank you for participating.

What was most special about the workshop was the thank you gift of sage and sweet grass from the Interior… the kind words of acknowledgment… and a song.  At the end of the workshop, the AbEd team played on a big drum while I played on my baby wolf drum ‘Dragonfly.’  We sang the ‘Woman’s Warrior Song’ to honour me.  What an honour.  I was humbled.  Chills went up and down my spine.  There is no better thank you than that.  THANK YOU SD46 ABORIGINAL EDUCATION LSA.  It was an amazing and unforgettable teaching and learning experience.

Rotisserie Christine

The weather has changed and ‘Rotisserie Christine’ begins.  Oh man, was I cold tonight.  With a flick of a switch, the fire place was turned on and I was rotating myself horizontally on the floor ensuring an even heating of my entire body.  I had full intentions of writing but took a nap instead.  Now, I’m up.  Warm and toasty.  Ahhh… back to fall and winter weather.