It’s Time

Whoa. It’s time. It’s a strange feeling I get inside… one that I have denied before. This time, I hope I am a bit more responsive and the turnaround time is a bit more expedient. Lately, I’ve been feeling that feeling for quite some time. I try to suppress it with hopes of it fading away. However, what starts off as a whisper sometimes turns into a kick in the face. I don’t want to be caught off guard. I am answering the call.

Nothing beats a good dose of denial. Denial turns into avoidance. Avoidance transforms itself into numbness. Yup. Going through life numb is the furthest thing from living your life to the fullest. Many of us do it… without even knowing it. Been there. The existence is bleak. I love being on the learning curve. It excites me. It scares me. It challenges me. So, why push those feelings aside? Acknowledge them.

Let’s be clear… I don’t want to make this a doom and gloom blog entry. That is furthest from my intentions. In fact, I did a hefty free-write yesterday and now it’s undergoing some serious revisions to get to this final product. What I do know for sure is this… You will not be rewarded for enduring another day of numbness. You just won’t. So what are you going to do about it? Will it be the status quo?

I am so grateful for friends who ask me the tough questions… Who is in your tribe? What is your obsession? Will you be returning back to teaching? Blah, blah, blah… I have no idea. Never thought about it. Tribe… Obsession… Teaching… I think that sums it up right there. I have met some incredible people in the last 5 years and know who I resonate with. I am obsessed with professional learning and how it connects to student learning. And yes, I realized that I really miss teaching in the classroom.

Teaching is something that I do all of the time. I teach as an educational consultant. I teach as a workshop facilitator. I teach as a school trustee. Teaching is a broad term and we all do it to some capacity. It was just today that I had visions of teaching math classes again. I loved the challenge of making mathematics fun, exciting, and engaging… for me and the students. I loved getting in the faces of my students.

Just the other night, I was so charged up (on Vietnamese Iced Coffee) as I was planning for a workshop I am delivering to teachers in the next month. I loved visualizing the crowd, predicting what they need to learn, and creating a structure to the day that would provoke professional learning. That was a BIG high for me. This is my obsession… Creating meaningful learning experiences for others.

Hmm… this gets me thinking about my tribe. Those who are in my tribe are those who can talk about education as much as I do. I love talking about assessment and evaluation, effective pedagogy, and educational leadership. I get so energized talking to people about education. You know who you are. Some are trustees. Some are superintendents. Some are teachers. There is not one distinct cohort per se where my tribe resides, but I’m sure glad there are people out there who are just like me.

So back to those feelings that have been niggling in my spirit and soul. Things are pretty lined up for the rest of the summer and the fall. I am currently challenged with new work and I am enjoying every opportunity that has presented itself to me as it relates to education. I feel that that there is a momentum building and I want to be prepared for the new year. What are my next steps? Where am I heading?

Hmm… I think this a nice segway to my next blog. Thank you bloggies for reading and letting me vent my thoughts. I know that I’m not alone. I’ve been letting go lately and saying goodbye. I guess this is my way to make space for what’s next. #awesome